When you say "90-Seconds", you think, "That's not much time at all!" 90-seconds. A minute-and-a-half. Not much can happen in that amount of time. Or, can it?
According to Neuro-Scientist and Neuro-Anatomist Jill Bolte Taylor, 90-seconds is the longest amount of time that an emotion can last in anyone's body... unless we choose to hold onto it and stay angry after the initial 90 seconds of chemical/physiological response... or we choose to let go of it and shut off the anger after 90 seconds and be at peace. It is our choice as Dr. Taylor says to "either consciously or unconsciously to rethink the thoughts that re-stimulates the circuit."
That may sound astounding, even unbelievable, based on our culture and past understanding. You might even be thinking, "Oh, come on! Really?!!" Then, why don't we just do it? Why don't we control our emotions much more effectively? I'll answer those questions in just a bit. But, first, here's another piece of information Neuroscience has found in recent years:
Dr. V. Ramachadran at San Diego University, a world renowned Neuroscientist, says that Neuroscience has had to accept a change in thinking. He said that neuroscientists used to believe that humans intellectualize one another before we sense one another. He said that they now know that we humans sense (feel) one another, first, and then intellectualize. Just consider what your experiences have been. When you meet someone for the first time and you've gotten that feeling of "this is a nice person" or "I don't trust this person". Where did those thoughts come from? Did you do an analysis a mental background check and come up with those thoughts? Or, were they feelings that got transferred into thoughts? In fact, don't you say things, like, "I just have this feeling about this person"?
90-seconds. Fully consider how properly managing your emotions will change your life.
For instance, just think about it in a daily event. You're driving and someone cuts you off. You get angry. What does it now mean to you now knowing that in 90-seconds you have the choice to make; do I continue to be angry or just let it go and have positive thoughts? How much road-rage would this eliminate? How much less stress would people feel while driving? But, in most cultures, we learn that people aren't supposed to cut us off. They have to make way for us. They shouldn't act that way.
What about an area that can be much more impactful on your life, death? Our social conditioning tells us that there must be extended grief. Yet, did you know that a person could complete the grieving process in one day, maybe less? But, here's why we don't; our culture in the U.S. would frown on that. Our love for the deceased would be questioned. I experienced this myself when my daughter died last Easter morning; people attempted to make me feel guilty because I didn't grieved extensively. They wondered how I could carry on with life so quickly. But, I had grieved the amount a human really needs, not what society or culture demands. Somehow vague, made-up time frames have been put in place that say "if you don't grieve this long, then you really didn't love that person". Think about children who insist that the surviving parent wait a year, maybe longer, before dating. What a burden to place on someone because of a made-up tradition! Actually, in some cultures, it is considered in bad taste to weep and mourn at a funeral. They believe that God always knows the right time for us to leave the earth and that death is graduation. They also believe that grieving at someone's death is a lack of knowledge of life and would be showing selfishness. Since the person has gone to a better place, you're feeling sorry for no one but yourself. Even here in the U.S. some families have chosen to have a "Celebration of Life" ceremony versus a funeral, because they choose to give the meaning of appreciation and happiness to the life of the deceased, instead of mourning their loss.
90 seconds. Such a short, but not insignificant, amount of time. What will you do the next time you feel an emotion that you'd rather not have? Just as important, what will you do the next time you feel an emotion you want to have coming on? You have 90 seconds to decide...
Dr. Lewellen, at Transformative Thinking, has over 20 years of expanding the potential of corporations, religious organizations, not-for-profits, families and individuals. He is an expert in organizational alignment and motivation, organization and personal goal-setting, change management, and leadership. He is an expert in organizational alignment and motivation, organization and personal goal-setting, change management, leadership and staff
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